Amazon…Oh Amazon

There are not many things that can just stir my ire to a point of true frustration. Especially this time of year with all of the happiness and festivities that are going on. However, this year, Amazon has really found a way to get in that pot of ire and stir like no ones’ business!

It all started back on December 15th. Or so I thought. The wife was gone on a homeschool mom’s night with the other ladies. The kids and I were at home watching Return to Mayberry and cleaning. More watching than cleaning. Then it hit me that we needed to get the order in for the items that the kids wanted to get mom this year. So, I dashed to the handy laptop and pulled up our friend Amazon.com

With ease of melted butter the items flowed across the screen and within minutes everything was selected. The shopping experience could not have been any better. Options of sizes, colors, and accessories were all shown there for your viewing and reading pleasure. I placed the order and once the confirmation email came through I looked at the kids and said “Bamm! We are set! It will be here by Friday.” The kids cheered and we went back to watching Return to M…cleaning.

Within 5 minutes another email dinged on the laptop. Upon checking it I was greeted with the following :

Hello from Amazon.com.
We have placed a hold on your account because the billing details for your card did not match the details on file with the card issuer. You will not be able to access your account or place orders with us until we confirm your information.

You can help us resolve this matter quickly by replying to this message with the billing name, address, and phone number registered to your card. Please be sure to reply from the e-mail address registered to your Amazon.com account.

If you have recently moved, you may need to update your information with the card issuer before you reply to this message.
For your security, we restrict access to your billing details to a team of account specialists. Our Customer Service team cannot access these details or provide you with more information on this matter. They can only verify that we sent this request.

We ask that you not open new accounts as any order you place may be delayed.
Thank you for choosing Amazon.com.

 

Hmmmm…ok. I will send the information that they are needing for the card. I reply to this and go on my way happy as I can be. Later that night I thought about it and started to login to my account. This is where things went into the stirring pot. I could not login to my account. So, I tried again. Thinking I could have ate one to many THM cookies that my wife made and accidentally hit a wrong key on the password. Nope. I know what I can do, reset the password! I go through the steps to do this and ta-da the password is reset. I put in my email with the new password and

There was a problem with your request
There was an error with your E-Mail/Password combination. Please try again.

Now I am thinking “This is not good…I better check on this.” Quickly I type in Amazon customer service phone number in Google and there it is. 1 (888)280-3321 in case anyone else ever needs it. Upon calling this number I am told that my account is on hold. Hold? Hold for what? This is where Amazon needs help. The wonderful, and I mean this with all sincerity, wonderful customer service people at Amazon tried with all their might and ability to help me, but they are not allowed to “talk” to the account specialist. Supposedly they do not have phones in the account specialist part of Amazon or they are not allowed to give out the phone number to the customer service people. Now the account specialist are the only people who can look at your account and make changes. The customer service people, and supervisors, are only allowed to look at the basics of the account. They could only tell me that there was a bank disputed charge from earlier this year. WHAT?? They could only tell me that an account specialist would be in touch with me within 24 hours to help me once they email them the status of my account. 24 hours come and go and it becomes December 17th with no resolution. The pot of ire now has a house hold mixer placed in it and on medium.

I call back to the customer support and get another great person that listens, understands, and sends another email to the account specialist who will contact me within 24 hours. HOLD ON. I explained that I had already been down this road this week and the 24 hour thing was a no go, did not happen, and I was still waiting on it to occur. She stated that she could elevate it to a supervisor and make things happen quicker. YES!! So, I was glad that things were going to pick up and I could move on. Within 3 hours an email appears! Joy starts to flood my soul and I open it to see that an order that I placed back in April and I received was never paid! WHAT!! I owed $3,423.20! Great Scott Batman! They were kind enough to give me an order number so I thought I would look it up and see what I ordered at that amount. WAIT! I can’t access my account. I know, I will call the customer service line. To which I am told that since my account is on hold, they can not tell me what the order was. Only an account specialist can tell me that. And remember, I can’t talk to them. Someone will be in contact with me within 24 hours to help resolve the issue.

Soon I get an email from Amazon telling me the origins of the charge that has been disputed. YES, PROGRESS!! It was in reference to rockers that I purchased for the nursery in my church. The charges hit one at a time for $427.90 at 2:05 am. The bank went into super secret squirrel mode and declared fraud alert. They in turn called the church and a person there said “Yep. Our card must have been hacked again. Decline the charges.” A classic example of “DOH!” Well we contact the bank and they know what is going on now and is ready to accept the charges. PROBLEM! The new card to accept the charges is not listed on my payment method options. I reply to Amazon and let the account specialist know that the card is not on the account. I then get the following.

The hold on your account will remain, and we cannot process any orders until we receive payment for the orders that were sent in the past.

Please reply to this email with the last two digits of the credit card you wish to use. WE CAN ONLY CHARGE A PAYMENT METHOD TO A CARD WHICH IS ALREADY PRESENT ON YOUR AMAZON.COM ACCOUNT. For your own protection, do not send a full card number.

Once we’ve received this information, we will issue the charges to your specified card and reinstate your account. We appreciate your cooperation in the matter.

Sincerely,

Account Specialist
Amazon.com

The irony should be seen by their own email in which they explain, with all caps, that the card must be my account. Yet the first line states that my account is on hold. Am I the only one that sees this problem? Let’s take another look at it.
Amazon LoopI am stuck in the yellow zone! Even the customer service people at Amazon are understanding the problem and the supervisors that I have talked to understand the problem. They tell me they are sorry when they laugh at the loop that I am caught in, but this is a new one on them. I tell them I understand as I am laughing with them. But it is the 17th and I need mama’s Christmas shipped!

This continues through the day on the 18th till I talk to customer service representative “Joe”. Joe hears me and suggest the following. He will submit the form to cancel my transactions that I made on December 15th. I should then open another account with Amazon and make my order. SIMPLICITY! I quickly tell Joe to make it happen man and thank you. I will finish out this dispute over the other account after Christmas. I create another account. I even sign-up for Prime! I place the orders (even thought the prices went up). Get my conformation email and all is good as I lay my head down to sleep that night knowing that somewhere out there a person named Joe made a difference in Amazon and thanks to Prime, the presents will be here before Christmas.

I wake up on the 19th to an email from amazon that states the following:

Greetings from Amazon.com

This message is to inform you that we have closed your Amazon.com account.

We have taken this action because we found this account to be related to previously closed accounts. In addition, all open orders have been cancelled.

We are unable to discuss other accounts with you but please contact us should you have any other question; we’d be glad to assist you.

Sincerely,

Account Specialist
Amazon.com

Yep, that pot of ire just got a turbo charged mixer stirring away! So…Amazon, just tell me why I can not talk directly to a person that can take my credit card number and add it to my account so life can move on? It’s that simple. Allow two people to talk over the phone and take down the information so an account issue is solved. You get your $3,423.20 and I get the Christmas presents for my homeschooling mama. Your customer service people are great but there is a lack of communication that needs to be desperately fixed when it comes to the account specialist department. Not with the people themselves, but the way that the communication is done. Either way, Amazon let’s get this fixed before Christmas. Please!

Till next time…
I’m just a Husband of a Homeschooling Mom,
Steve Blackston

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